


Heels Over Head

by MoreThanSlightly (cadignan)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Altean magic, Everyone is Bad at Feelings Except Lance, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, POV Outsider, Repression, and let's be honest he's not that great at feelings so we're setting a pretty low standard here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-23 23:08:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16168679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cadignan/pseuds/MoreThanSlightly
Summary: Allura carries Shiro's consciousness within herself while she transfers it from the Black Lion into his body. She feels some residual effects.





	Heels Over Head

Allura carries Shiro’s consciousness within herself for ten steps, from the Black Lion to the clone’s body, and she feels the effort of every one. It’s strange, the way he lights her up and weighs her down. A body isn’t meant to hold more than one consciousness.

Later, when it’s time to take off, she finds herself standing in front of the Black Lion, waiting for it to let her in.

“Allura?” Keith asks.

His voice jars her out of the fog. “Oh! I was just…” She doesn’t know how to explain.

Keith is standing at her side with concern on his face. “You were amazing today. I’m sure it took a lot out of you. Are you okay to fly?”

“Yes, of course.” They need to go, and Allura won’t be the one to hold them up. As she enters the cockpit of the Blue Lion, even as familiar as it’s become, she can’t escape the feeling that she’s in the wrong place.

She ignores it. She’s quite good at pasting on a confident smile and forging ahead. Leadership requires it.

*

At their next stop, she tells everyone, individually, how well they’ve been holding it together. This is a difficult and trying voyage, and she appreciates everyone being such a good sport.

Allura walks away from her conversation with Hunk while gingerly touching her own mouth. Has she ever said the phrase _good sport_ to anyone before?

Without really meaning to, she finds herself walking to the end of their encampment to stand next to Keith, who seems taller than usual, as he looks out over the unfamiliar horizon of this grey wasteland of a planet.

“Sh—Allura,” he corrects himself as he turns to face her. “Do you… need something?”

Suddenly overcome, she pulls him into a hug. Keith is so important. They couldn’t do this without him.

“Uh, okay, I guess we’re… hugging,” he says. He brings one arm up and tentatively pats her on the back. It’s not at all the kind of contact she expected or desired.

She lets go instantly, blushing. Why did she do that? She cares for Keith as she cares for any of her fellow Paladins, and they’re friends, but she knows he’s not much for physical affection. Normally she respects that. “Er,” she says, at a loss to explain her own behavior. “Sorry. I just. The journey has been… stressful?”

“Okay,” he says, bewildered but trying very hard not to insult her or push her away.

Adolescent Keith would never have been able to do something like that. He’s grown up so much. Pride suffuses her.

What—adolescent Keith? She hasn't known Keith that long. Where are these thoughts coming from? She’s losing her mind.

“I’ll be going now,” Allura says, her face furiously hot.

On her way back to the center of the camp, she passes Shiro, who hasn’t fully recovered and is ambling slowly toward Keith, as he always does.

*

They cross through a field of asteroids, clustered dangerously close. A moment of focus gives Allura the clarity to cut a path through them with Blue’s laser. She sends out a series of precise blasts, sparing the team the work of weaving through.

“Nice work, Allura!” Keith says over the comms.

Keith is proud of her. He’s become such a good leader, spontaneously offering affirmations to his team, and she’s proud of him, and now he’s proud of her. She lets out a breathless giggle.

 _Quiznak_. She shuts off the comms before anyone can say anything. What’s _wrong_ with her?

*

Lance opens a private video channel while they’re flying through a long empty stretch of space. “Allura,” he says. “Can we… talk?”

“Of course.” She’s alone in the cockpit, thankfully, and so is he.

“Are you into Keith?” he blurts.

It’s charming how unsubtle he is, and Allura bursts out laughing. “What?”

“I get it. He came back all grown up and big, with a cool space wolf, and he’s the leader of Voltron _and_ a badass secret agent, and he’s all brood-y and mysterious, and somehow he’s making his dumb haircut work, I mean, it makes sense that after being into a space prince, you wouldn’t go for a nobody…”

“Lance,” she interrupts. “I’m not interested in Keith.”

“Are you sure? Because lately every time you look at him, you get this dopey smile on your face, and I saw you hug him, and any time he’s nice to you, you blush and laugh, and I swear, _every_ time we land, you go over to where he is and just kind of… stand there.”

She sighs. “I know my behavior has been strange. I don’t seem to have any control over it.”

“So you _are_ into him!”

“No. I’m not.”

“What gives, then?”

“I think it’s the alchemy I did when I saved Shiro’s life,” she confesses. She hasn’t told anyone yet, since she’s only just begun to suspect. She’s not even sure it’s her secret to tell. But Lance has noticed, and she feels she owes him the truth. “I’m feeling some residual effects of carrying his consciousness.”

“Wait, what?”

“These aren’t my feelings, Lance. They’re _Shiro’s_.”

“Oh my God,” he says. “Oh my God. This explains that time you got all leader-y and came to find me so you could call me a _good sport_.” He pauses. “I mean, not that you’re not normally encouraging. You’re a great leader. I mean that. It’s just… that wasn’t really your style.”

“It wasn’t,” she agrees.

“So this means Shiro is into Keith? And you’re not?” Lance sounds relieved.

Allura wishes she shared that feeling. “I would assume so.”

“Whoa. I mean, I knew Keith was into Shiro, but who wouldn’t be? Finding out it’s the other way around… well, I guess I did open this call by listing all the reasons you might be into Keith.”

Lance is blushing. It’s cute. And it’s a nice change for her, not to be the one who’s overwhelmed with feelings and awkwardly stumbling through a conversation.

“You did,” she says. “Not that I needed any help there. If what I’m feeling is only an echo of what Shiro truly feels, he’s… what’s that Earth expression? Heels over head?”

“Head over heels,” Lance says. “Although now that you mention it, heads are _normally_ over heels, so maybe it makes more sense your way. But if Shiro really feels that way, how come we’ve never noticed before?”

“I think he and Keith are already so close that it’s not as noticeable when it’s the two of them. And he’s quite good at hiding the rest. Whereas I have some practice at hiding my _own_ feelings, but I was unprepared for his.”

“You hide your feelings?” Lance asks, latching on to the part she was most hoping he’d miss.

“This whole experience has been very disconcerting. I can’t stop thinking about Keith. I feel rather… like I’m witnessing something I wasn’t invited to watch. I was hoping the effects would fade with time, but so far they haven’t.”

“Weird,” Lance pronounces. “Well, usually the solution with feelings is to talk about them, right? So why don’t you do that?”

“Is that not what we’re doing?”

“No, don’t tell _me_. Tell Shiro. He obviously hasn’t figured this out. He bottled it up so much that _you’re_ feeling it. You should let him know, and then maybe he’ll act on it, and maybe that will fix things.”

“Lance,” Allura says, delighted. “That’s brilliant! You’re quite good at this.”

“Oh sure. I’m great at it when it’s other people.” He hangs up then, sounding rather disgruntled, for some reason.

*

It takes some time to arrange a private meeting with Shiro in the cockpit of the Blue Lion, and Allura has to enlist the help of the wolf. She apologizes to him for disparaging his chewing and drooling earlier, as he’s essential to her plans, and he seems to accept her apology. At the very least, he brings her Shiro.

“You wanted to see me?” Shiro asks. He stands to the side of her chair, as uncertain as she’s ever seen him.

Allura focuses on her controls. “Er, yes. It’s a delicate subject. I’m not sure how to broach it, so I’ll get to the point. I’ve been feeling your feelings.”

Shiro blanches, wide-eyed and horrified. “You… what?”

“I carried your consciousness from the Black Lion into your body, and it’s had some residual effects. Some of your feelings in particular are quite… sticky.”

“Wow. I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry.”

Hearing his mortified tone makes Allura regret _sticky_ as a word choice. She continues to act as if flying the Lion requires all of her attention, even though Blue needs nothing from her at the moment. “Please don’t say anything at all to me. It’s Keith you should talk to.”

“What?”

She glances up at him. “Shiro. I’ve felt only a ghostly remnant of what you feel, and I know you’re in love with him. There’s no need to pretend otherwise.”

“I’m not— _love_?”

He looks so helpless that she restrains herself from patting him on the head. “Shiro. Since I recognized the problem, I’ve been exerting all of my energy _not_ staring at Keith and wandering after him like a lovestruck feather-tailed quirple pup trailing its lifelong mate. It is _exhausting_. Please, for my sake, do something about it so I can be free of this.”

“You think… me talking to Keith… would fix this?”

“I was hoping the passage of time would do it, but it’s been almost a phoeb. This solution at least offers us—or you, rather—an opportunity for action. And really, what have you got to lose?”

“Uh. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, since you did save my life and it sounds like you’ve been paying for it, but… my dignity?”

She blinks. “Why is your dignity at stake?”

“I’m supposed to confess my feelings to Keith, remember?” Shiro says. “He doesn’t feel that way about me. He thinks of me as a brother. He said so.”

They are no longer denying that Shiro has feelings for Keith. That’s progress. She draws upon all of her patience and says, “I’ve had cause to examine your behavior and his over this last phoeb, since my last act of alchemy granted me a new perspective on the matter, and I’m quite sure you’re mistaken. Besides which, you are not biologically his brother, correct?”

Shiro nods.

“Perhaps we can assume he was expressing how close he feels to you? What was the context?”

“It was during the fight.” Shiro does not have to specify which fight. He can’t meet her gaze. “He… he said ‘I love you.’”

Allura twists in her chair and glares at him. “Takashi Shirogane. I did not take you for a coward.”

He winces.

“I have been living with your feelings all this time and it has been making me miserable! I can’t even imagine how _you_ feel. By all the ancients, if you do not put a stop to this nonsense and talk to him, _I will_. I’m sure Keith has some questions about the number of times I’ve tenderly squeezed his shoulder of late.”

“Shit,” he says. “Sorry. I’ll say something to him.”

“I accept your apology. And make no mistake—you absolutely should do this for me. But you should do it for _you_ , too. You’ve suffered so much, Shiro, there’s no need to inflict anything else on yourself. You deserve something good in your life. So does he.”

*

Next time they land, Allura looks right at Keith and her heart rate stays exactly the same. No color rises to her cheeks. No urge spurs her to touch him. He’s just a friend. She exhales a deep sigh of relief.

When Shiro comes out of the Black Lion after Keith and drops a kiss on his cheek, she beams. She’s free. They’re free. She can’t remember the last time a problem had such a beautifully simple solution.

Then she walks to the Red Lion and finds Lance. “You know, I’ve recently learned a lesson about the consequences of repressing one’s feelings.”

He raises his eyebrows. “Yeah?”

She grabs him by the shoulders and kisses him on the mouth.


End file.
